Post by frwfallguy on Feb 9, 2009 11:23:47 GMT -5
From the desk of a very tired Maverick Wild...
I think I am going to have to accept that with 40 being about a year and a half off… I don’t know if a wrestling ring is where I belong anymore.
This weekend on a show in Peabody I hurt myself-not being thrown around, or performing some mind boggling advanced move. I hurt myself getting out of the ring. I simply went to hop off the ring apron, put my right hand down on the ring apron and POP-did something to my right elbow. It’s pathetic…I can’t even move my arm and I didn’t even do anything! This would have been sometime after I “blew up” (became exhausted) after exchanging a few holds with Chris Venom. Somehow-out of some ill conceived feeling of respect and/or pity-my tag team partner tolerated carrying me through a match as my breath broke and fell from my throat in rasping gulps like a dull serrated knife rhythmically tearing at my windpipe and chest.
Years ago, I used to be very proud of my durability. I always had pain to deal with. I mean nuts-it has been said numerous times- “there is no such thing as a good bump”. Something would get hurt though, and I’d just shift to landing or running or moving on another part of my body. Maverick the invincible. What a thingyy jerk I was.
Up until about 3 years ago…whenever some new wrestler everyone was talking about as some new prospective superstar came out-I admit it. I would say to myself, “I can keep up with this kid”. And, to my credit, when given the chance…I did. I don’t know what happened or when I lost the ability to see through all the pain and keep going, but I can’t do it anymore. A few months back though, I wrestled Frankie Arion in Springfield, Ma. About 10 minutes in, I just didn’t have it in me to go. I knew there was a problem, but I bullnuts myself. This weekend brought it to the surface though.. I’m too old and beat up to do this at any level I would consider high output. If I can’t produce anymore, I don’t want to hang around stinking up the joint on a regular basis.
Not while I still have just a little pride left, anyway.
Trouble is-21 years of that has left me with numerous, repeat injuries. I’ve run out of body parts to use as a crutch. If my right knee hurts, I can’t shift over to the left one ‘cause it’s shot. If I lock out my knees and move like that-my nutsty low back starts to ache. My right elbow is screwed up, but I can’t hit you with the left side because of the bone spurs in the left side shoulder. When the disc that’s “out” in the middle of my back hurts, I can’t bump higher on my back because it hurts my arthritic neck. Hell, I can’t even grab on and hold onto someone anymore with holds; too many of my fingers have been broken/dislocated too many times and my grip is shot. I can’t even go for semi-long anymore as I get blown up too quick; that doesn’t make sense, because I work out like a maniac. I think I’m tightening up out of sheer fear of screwing something else up in my body.
I’m sick of X-rays. I’m tired of MRI’s and catscans. I’m depleted by doctors who either trying to hand me pain killers like their f**kin’ M & M’s or the other extreme of them looking at me like I’m trying to score a fix when all I really want to do is be able to walk without limping and play catch with my kid. I’ve been under the knife 3 times in as many years. Physical rehab doesn’t do anything. My doctor tells me that my muscles, after YEARS of hard, hard exercise, are (in her words) “over developed” and there is no way I’m going to make anything stronger to compensate for weaker parts. The only other way to mask it-that I can see anyway-is to kill the pain with prescription pain pills; I’d rather avoid the type of rehabilitation that’s bound to bring on eventually. As my buddy Rip would put it, “I’m broke thingy”.
Maybe it’s time for me to stop. I used to be able to suck it up. I don’t know what happened to that part of me…it somehow got lost along the way. That fire that burns inside of you making you be able to get past all this nuts may have finally burned itself-or me-out. As it stands, it feels like my old ass is just taking up valuable space best left to much younger, more career oriented people that want to do things that people may actually want to see.
I’ll be wrestling on February 20th in Rindge, NH in a six man tag team match. Hopefully, I can handle that. If not-I have to consider knocking this nuts off. I'll still run shows if it comes to that, but I'm not going to soak up space that someone far more able bodied than myself could fill.
Scott Cameron Despres
I think I am going to have to accept that with 40 being about a year and a half off… I don’t know if a wrestling ring is where I belong anymore.
This weekend on a show in Peabody I hurt myself-not being thrown around, or performing some mind boggling advanced move. I hurt myself getting out of the ring. I simply went to hop off the ring apron, put my right hand down on the ring apron and POP-did something to my right elbow. It’s pathetic…I can’t even move my arm and I didn’t even do anything! This would have been sometime after I “blew up” (became exhausted) after exchanging a few holds with Chris Venom. Somehow-out of some ill conceived feeling of respect and/or pity-my tag team partner tolerated carrying me through a match as my breath broke and fell from my throat in rasping gulps like a dull serrated knife rhythmically tearing at my windpipe and chest.
Years ago, I used to be very proud of my durability. I always had pain to deal with. I mean nuts-it has been said numerous times- “there is no such thing as a good bump”. Something would get hurt though, and I’d just shift to landing or running or moving on another part of my body. Maverick the invincible. What a thingyy jerk I was.
Up until about 3 years ago…whenever some new wrestler everyone was talking about as some new prospective superstar came out-I admit it. I would say to myself, “I can keep up with this kid”. And, to my credit, when given the chance…I did. I don’t know what happened or when I lost the ability to see through all the pain and keep going, but I can’t do it anymore. A few months back though, I wrestled Frankie Arion in Springfield, Ma. About 10 minutes in, I just didn’t have it in me to go. I knew there was a problem, but I bullnuts myself. This weekend brought it to the surface though.. I’m too old and beat up to do this at any level I would consider high output. If I can’t produce anymore, I don’t want to hang around stinking up the joint on a regular basis.
Not while I still have just a little pride left, anyway.
Trouble is-21 years of that has left me with numerous, repeat injuries. I’ve run out of body parts to use as a crutch. If my right knee hurts, I can’t shift over to the left one ‘cause it’s shot. If I lock out my knees and move like that-my nutsty low back starts to ache. My right elbow is screwed up, but I can’t hit you with the left side because of the bone spurs in the left side shoulder. When the disc that’s “out” in the middle of my back hurts, I can’t bump higher on my back because it hurts my arthritic neck. Hell, I can’t even grab on and hold onto someone anymore with holds; too many of my fingers have been broken/dislocated too many times and my grip is shot. I can’t even go for semi-long anymore as I get blown up too quick; that doesn’t make sense, because I work out like a maniac. I think I’m tightening up out of sheer fear of screwing something else up in my body.
I’m sick of X-rays. I’m tired of MRI’s and catscans. I’m depleted by doctors who either trying to hand me pain killers like their f**kin’ M & M’s or the other extreme of them looking at me like I’m trying to score a fix when all I really want to do is be able to walk without limping and play catch with my kid. I’ve been under the knife 3 times in as many years. Physical rehab doesn’t do anything. My doctor tells me that my muscles, after YEARS of hard, hard exercise, are (in her words) “over developed” and there is no way I’m going to make anything stronger to compensate for weaker parts. The only other way to mask it-that I can see anyway-is to kill the pain with prescription pain pills; I’d rather avoid the type of rehabilitation that’s bound to bring on eventually. As my buddy Rip would put it, “I’m broke thingy”.
Maybe it’s time for me to stop. I used to be able to suck it up. I don’t know what happened to that part of me…it somehow got lost along the way. That fire that burns inside of you making you be able to get past all this nuts may have finally burned itself-or me-out. As it stands, it feels like my old ass is just taking up valuable space best left to much younger, more career oriented people that want to do things that people may actually want to see.
I’ll be wrestling on February 20th in Rindge, NH in a six man tag team match. Hopefully, I can handle that. If not-I have to consider knocking this nuts off. I'll still run shows if it comes to that, but I'm not going to soak up space that someone far more able bodied than myself could fill.
Scott Cameron Despres
